livingvertical Archives -

Week one done (bigbluetest)!

By Steve on October 23, 2013 in Big Blue Test, Diabetes

If we are fighting diabetes then consistent exercise (combined with a reasonably healthy diet) is how we punch our adversary in the throat. That is the gem of wisdom that I have distilled from this first week of testing, getting active and testing again-every day for at least 15 minutes. It’s simple. It’s not always easy or convenient but it’s about getting back to basics.

Its no secret that the last several months have been challenging for me diabetes wise-which of course trickles down to every other aspect of life. The BigBlueTest has given me an opportunity to really get back on my feet in this fight and build momentum. So far this week I haven’t been scaling rock faces (for the most part; I did deviate once and wind up the side of a cliff). Most of my BigBlueTests have been really mundane things like…walking. Taking some time to push away from the computer and put one foot in front of the other.

Just walking…nothing fancy.

Im also at the end of my lease here at my apartment, so that means I have to find somewhere else to live. It’s stressful, but there is some benefit in the exercise. I place a lot of value in spectacular places and experiences, but ultimately one has to be willing to take the small steps that get you from one place to the next. Everything happens in stages, in cycles. Rising and falling. Some days are harder than others and that is ok-its part of the process. The BigBlueTest has given me an opportunity to get back up and start riding the next wave, filled with limitless potential.

The weather here bas been magnificent and it’s a struggle to tear myself away from planning the “next big project”. I keep looking at these amazing objectives…big walls, boulders, overhanging limestone…it all speaks to me. At the end of the day I can’t get there by sitting here and talking. Doing is always more effective than talking-and just doing a little is where all the big things start.

Rob, helping me search for good ideas, somewhere in the abyss…

Where will these small steps take us? No way to know without just getting out there and trying. Fifteen minutes a day isn’t a lot but it’s a start. I’d love for you to join me-three weeks left to do the test and log it at www.bigbluetest.org. What you do matters-and you have the chance to share it and help others!

By Steve on October 16, 2013 in Big Blue Test, Diabetes

LivingVertical has partnered with the Diabetes Hands Foundation to promote the Big Blue Test-this is an awesome initiative that empowers people with diabetes through exercise-of any kind, combined with targeted blood glucose measurement. Your participation will help YOU (and others when you share and promote the Big Blue Test) AND will generate a $5.00 donation to life saving diabetes charities for every entry logged!

What’s not to love about this? You don’t even have to have diabetes to participate-see the photo above!

Speaking personally, the idea of empowering people with diabetes through exercise is what prompted me to live out of my car and establish LivingVertical through Project365. Recently, I have been in need of motivation to get back into a training cycle and take better control of my blood sugar (climbing mountains doesn’t mean I don’t have slumps!) and the Big Blue Test is just what I need to get back on the horse-and to step my game up a little bit!

There is a lot more to adventure and climbing than what people label as “extreme” and over this next month, I am going to be showing how taking your diabetes on an adventure is something that anyone can do-through videos, photos and blogs! That is how I am going to be doing my Big Blue Tests-with simple, functional fitness. Please join me in taking steps to change lives through participating in this initiative-every day from now until November 14th, World Diabetes Day!

Of course, you know that I can’t simply swear off my rope and rack for a whole month-so I am planning a special World Diabetes Day climb for the culmination of the Big Blue Test-it’s going to be something special! Diabetes is what we make of it. Let’s take advantage of this opportunity to make our world better for living powerfully with this condition, one step at a time.

For Day 1 of the Big Blue Test, I took my Diabetes up to the summit of Angels Landing in Zion National Park. No ropes, no harnesses, no technical climbing. Just putting one foot in front of the other. Join us!

Sometimes the hardest thing to be-is yourself.

By Steve on October 9, 2013 in Diabetes, Uncategorized

It’s been about 24 hours since I returned from my most recent travels. Africa. Europe. Driving across the US. Lots of ups and downs both in terms of topography and diabetes. Going into this trip I felt like I had things pretty well sorted out in terms of my diabetes. Then, somehow my control started slipping and suddenly my sugar won’t come down despite repeated correction injections. Then, out of nowhere on some days, my sugar decides to plummet with barely any provocation.

It’s been 14 years-almost 15 now. Shouldn’t this be getting easier?

Diabetes is a mental challenge with a physical manifestation. I don’t struggle with the physiology of diabetes. I struggle with the psychology of this condition. Yeah, I climb mountains for fun and I like steep places. I know that diabetes doesn’t have to stop me from anything I want to achieve. I also know that since I am in control, my ability to flip that switch on and accomplish seemingly significant feats is only a hairs-breadth away from a complete lack of desire to try and the utter acceptance of defeat-and when I fall into that rut, I can really wind up taking a beating-even in spite of the massive outpourings of love and support that have come in the last week or so-depression isn’t rational-it doesn’t need a reason to kick you in the shorts.

It’s a fine line to walk. I use diabetes as my motivation but some days, I just don’t want to play this game anymore. Today I wallowed in absolute despair as my blood sugar skyrocketed to 295 as I sat at the computer, trying to cobble together a workable climbing project for 2014 that will leave room for training and the Project365 film tour this fall/winter. Suddenly I just felt like I wanted to start updating my resume and cash in my chips. The documentary is finished, or just about. We have that paid for and that means we finished what we set out to do, right?

It’s really hard to be yourself sometimes. Maybe I lost myself in Project365 and I don’t know how to function with bigger projects and the knowledge that people are watching. Maybe caring too much about succeeding is the problem. Or maybe, I have been too focused on what I “should” be doing and what people expect of me. Maybe it’s time to just get back to basics. It may be a little self indulgent but I feel like I have slipped away from just being myself and really sharing my struggle through this blog. It’s become more business-like and “what’s new with LivingVertical” and while that’s all well and good, it’s not…me.

I finally stepped away from the computer this afternoon to go for a walk to check the mail and bring my blood sugar down. I managed to hate every square inch of the sidewalk between home and the post office and it made me realize that I am upset with myself and that it is my own complacency that has caused a lot of these issues. Once the project ended, it was easy to be lazy. I had earned that right…but once you fall into that routine, it gets harder to get back on the wagon.

So now, it’s back to square one. I get to go through the process of building myself back up and seeing how high I can reach. I know a lot of people see the summit photos and that’s their takeaway as to how I live my life with diabetes. For me, those summits are the bright light at the end of the tunnel that make it worthwhile for me to get out of bed and keep fighting what feels like an impossible battle.

It’s not easy to be yourself when you don’t know who to be or what you are. But I know that I usually wind up making sense of things when I fling myself out of the frying pan and into the fire. So…that is what I am going to do. I am not a businessperson, or a blogger or an artist or an advocate or a spokesperson. Im Steve. I have diabetes and I climb things. The rest is just details-so I have to get back to being me again, because none of this was supposed to be easy in the first place-it just has to be worthwhile.

Amazed.

By Steve on October 3, 2013 in Uncategorized

Let me preface this post by noting that I am enroute from NY to UT but I am stopping to write this update because I want to share how this moment feels.

When I woke up this morning our funding campaign was 2500 or so short of the goal. I was worried. I was trying to figure out a good concession blog, thanking everyone for their help and figuring out how to press on.

But all that is obsolete now.

We did it. YOU did it. From the beginning of Project365 we asked for support and you gave it. The project happened. Now, the film will happen and be a finished, professional work that will help that message of empowerment LIVE and grow. You have paid that forward and given that gift to many people with diabetes and their families, who you may never even know about or meet. We did that together. I feel so honored and blessed to have been a part of this.

I am so humbled that you all have so much faith in LivingVertical. It means everything seeing this in action. Every single one of you who helped-contributing, sharing, liking, recommending…it’s amazing.

So what makes this even more amazing, is that this afternoon I headed to meet with Jeffrey who has guest blogged here, as a fellow Type 1 climber. When we met up, I was busy worrying about funding and all of what “comes next”.

We had such a great connection-through the climbing and diabetes-that I just stopped worrying. And suddenly, we were closing on on 100%…what better way to celebrate than with a TeamLV climbing session!

I started off the day wondering and worrying-but I let go of expectations-which have been TOTALLY exceeded.

Now I must turn my attention to the road between PA and UT… If you want to join, I’ll be all over Facebook between here and there.

Oh-I am SO excited to thank all our project contributors with the finished movie. I believe you will not be disappointed with the work that has been done!

climbing diabetes diabetic climber insulin livingvertical type 1

53 hours remain

By Steve on October 1, 2013 in Uncategorized

Here’s the situation: we have 53 hours to raise $2,525. Once the film is funded, then I’ll quit asking for help. We need less than $2 from each of our Facebook followers to make it happen. Surely that’s a reasonable ticket price for a movie these days?

If the funding goal isn’t met, what will happen? Is Livingvertical headed for a shutdown?

Well, LivingVertical will always exist in some form or another but we are heading for a situation where I will have to choose between releasing an unfinished product that won’t live up to the scope of Project365 or simply waiting until I can save enough money to pay finishing costs out of pocket. Either of these options will take LivingVertical back to square one.

There has never been a plan “B”. This was always about taking on commitment. Project365 is ours-it’s not mine. So I’m giving it back to you-to do with it what you want, because I’ve done my part and I can’t do the rest without support. It’s that simple.

I’ve done all I can do-I’ve invested the last two years of my life in creating this, and I’m prepared to keep on giving-but it’s not really up to me now. It’s hard to let go when you want something so badly, but sometimes that’s the only option left. I want to level with you all and be honest about what I can and can’t do and the position we are in.

If it’s not a little scary, then you’re probably not going all out. No plan “B” feels more than a little scary-but after coming this far, it’s too late to go back-and I wouldn’t, even if I could.

climbing diabetes diabetic climber livingvertical Project365 steve richert type 1 diabetes

A first look at Kilimanjaro!

By Steve on September 26, 2013 in project kilimanjaro

Here is a promo video of the documentary made about the expedition to Kilimanjaro-this is not the full version, but it’s a great teaser! Our camera/production crew (Wes and Dan totally got after it and did amazing work!) Enjoy this, share it and get psyched-the full version will be awesome and I’ll be sharing my own story of the climb too in a separate video that I shot on my own!

If you can see this, your browser doesn’t understand IFRAME. However, we’ll still link you to the video.

climbing diabetes Kilimanjaro livingvertical stephen richert steve richert type 1

It’s not just the Haggis

By Steve on September 10, 2013 in project kilimanjaro

You may (or may not) be wondering what happened since I arrived in Tanzania as I detailed in my previous post. I promise I will get to that soon enough, but I want to process and edit photos before I get too in depth there. For now, suffice to say that I went there and did not perish on the mountain.

Currently, I am making my way home by way of Europe. Having friends in Scotland and family in Germany dictated that I take the opportunity to stop off in the old world since it is quite literally “on the way” and I could in no way afford to make a separate excursion to Europe just for leisure purposes.

Having spent a couple eventful days waiting for lost baggage to arrive and hoping that the insulin contained therein would not be ruined, I got to explore a bit.

I know it may be disappointing, but I haven’t been exploring the vertical Scotland. I felt thrashed after Kilimanjaro and I just want to do “normal” things and try to gain some weight back.

My usual is 185lbs and I was 170lbs when I left the US before Kili. I’m sure I lost some bulk while on the mountain, with all the stomach issues…so I’m exploring taking more insulin and eating more carbs. That’s been outside my comfort zone for a long time.

It turns out that I enjoy eating more than I remembered. And the food here-wow! Not only does it taste amazing-it’s actually “real” food. Comparing the ingredients lists in virtually everything, it strikes me how much less processed and stuffed with chemicals the food is here in the UK.

Peanut butter for example, is just smashed peanuts and sea salt. That’s it. That’s normal! You don’t have to pay way more to get simple, straight up food-and there’s something really amazing about that.

Yes, I have been eating Haggis every day for lunch and sometimes breakfast too…and it’s so great to have access to foods that are unheard of in the US. But the Haggis is only half of the battle-everything is higher quality food wise. It makes me wonder why we don’t demand higher quality in the states. We get all the movies and electronics before everyone else, yet we accept lower quality foods readily.

On the other hand, it’s harder to stop eating. The food is just so…wonderful that I’ve about doubled my insulin intake. For now that’s ok-but it’s going to be tough to get back into austerity/training mode. Speaking of which, I’ll need to decide on my next project. Soon. Once I get the movie finished and complete the film tour!

Next stop, Germany, then back to the states.

accu-chek climbing diabetes diabetic climber Duracell Haggis JDRF livingvertical sanofi Scotland steve richert T1D

In case you missed the Athletic Achievement Awards!

By Steve on August 19, 2013 in project 365, Uncategorized

This weekend, I was honored to be a finalist in the Insulindependence Athletic Achievement Award for 2013-I submitted a short video about Project365 along with 24 other amazing athletes with diabetes, many of whom I am proud to call personal friends. To be honest I was pretty surprised to make it that far in the first place-I know that climbing is exciting and novel in its own way, but so many of the folks who also entered are far beyond me in terms of athletics. To be honest I have never considered myself an athlete-just a diabetic with a climbing habit that has steered my life through the challenges of this chronic illness.

I have to remember that last line, that’s going to be the epigram for my book when I write it…

As things turned out, my video was viewed almost 5,000 times thanks to YOU-who watched, shared, “liked”, tweeted, retweeted, blogged, reblogged, harassed, pestered and publicized. That was good enough to get me invited to San Diego to the final award ceremony and I felt very honored. The other two gentlemen that were finalists along with me have been good friends and super supportive of Project365 from the outset. Really wonderful people, sincere, with a heart for helping people with diabetes-the kind of people that I knew I’d be happy for if they won over me, the kind of people that I’d feel a little sheepish and humbled winning over them.

Going into the competition, I was committed to one thing: winning the award. During this weekend, prior to the presentation of the award, something changed in my mind. The appeal of the award paled in comparison to the magic that happens when you get a couple hundred passionate, incredibly talented and committed people together who are all in pursuit of the same goal. This creates competition-where people are vying for publicity and funding-basic needs that sustain our efforts-but competition-and staying “hungry” is important. It’s not a negative thing to say ‘hey, I want to win this’. It causes all of us to elevate our game and our minds. Moreover, it creates waves that reverberate outside of the diabetes community to indicate that there are enough of us out there who are getting after it to really create some competition-and that is a beautiful thing that none of us could do alone!

By this point you must have figured out that I didn’t win the competition. Honesty is an important (if not widely appreciated) quality-and so I’ve got to say, when it hit me that I would not be taking home the $5,000.00 that would help complete the documentary that I have poured my entire life into for 2 years, it felt like a failure. I failed. Why wasn’t I good enough to get more people to vote for me? I have always been my harshest critic and my reaction is always to initially take challenges and internalize them. Challenges like diabetes. Like falling off climbs.

Some people seem to think I’m a “professional diabetic” to borrow a phrase from Bill Carlson, or that diabetes isn’t a struggle for me because I climb “stuff”. Between the summits that I have shared through Project365 there have been valleys darker than a well-diggers colon-depression, despair, inadequacy, you name it-and it periodically crashes in on me. Writing this blog is one of the hardest ones I have ever had to do. I don’t like to admit that I don’t handle challenges well-frequently. I’d like to be seen as a class act that can accept failure with grace-but it’s a struggle for me and like it or not, that’s me and it’s out there.

But that moment passed and I put on my big-boy pants and realized that this award was never mine to begin with and that I had not lost anything. I had fabricated a path in my mind and attached myself to an outcome rather than just being open. That was my only failure! This moment, this award, had belonged to someone else and that was our success together as a community.

Yesterday, I had some time to talk to Scott and as we shared stories and congratulated each other, I felt like a fool for even allowing myself to entertain the feeling of failure. This weekend was an opportunity for me to reset my perspective again, and I am very thankful that Scott is such a gracious guy-and I am truly excited for him to explore the horizons of his athletics-and hopefully to come climbing with me like we have been planning for a year!

So what’s next? Well, this isn’t really a setback for the Project365 documentary. I am more inspired than I have ever been and more motivated to complete what we all started together. We will take a different route to the summit-and it will be superb. I hope that you, my partners won’t sever the ropes that connect us, upon realizing that I have flaws that I have yet to master.

Paradigm shift

By MainAdmin on July 30, 2013 in LivingVertical

I haven’t blogged in a while. Some of you may not have noticed, while still others may be thankful for a vacation from my self indulgent, esoteric ramblings. The reality is that I have been feeling very uninspired. This may sound like heresy coming from a person who voluntarily has very little on their resume besides “tries to inspire others”. I struggle with feelings of inadequacy and even guilt-how can I be trying to give others something that I don’t possess myself? Isn’t this hypocrisy?

Seeking some light in dark places with wonderful people, Lee and Alan.

I worry about continuing LivingVertical-every day is spent corresponding, reaching out for support, ordering merchandise, working on the documentary, trying to find investors for it, venues that want to screen it…my thought is only to the future which I can’t see-and it looks like all of the work and sacrifice that led me to this point has just been a false start, with no real “legs”.

Reflections.

As I wallow in worry, frustration and self pity, I realize that in several days, the culmination of two years of blood, sweat and tears will be upon me and that I am at my lowest personal ebb over the last several years, and I have friends and supporters who see a much better person in me than I see when I look in the mirror, converging upon Springdale UT to see what I have been building. I don’t want to disappoint them-but I dig deep within myself and feel empty and hopeless.

This weekend is also the SweetestSummit Diabetes Family Adventure Weekend, my first opportunity to run a guided program for the diabetes community, in my own back yard, in the cliffs and canyons that inspired me to take on Project365. Families begin to arrive and I am sorting out logistics. Who is staying where, what time are we meeting in the morning, what gear do we need, is it ok to bring a DSLR camera out with us, what sort of snacks should we bring, how much water do we need…and on and on. I put out as many fires as I can and go to bed. Tomorrow is Day one of camp and I’ll need to maximize the 4 hours of sleep I can get between now and the alarm.

me and some of the girls, Kaia, Grace and Zoe.

Day one goes well in that the kids all become instant friends and are obviously enjoying themselves and the climbing we are doing.

I am trying to balance fun with technical instruction because we need the kids to be proficient in rappelling so that we can descend a technical slot canyon on the final day of camp. I am learning a great deal about how parents manage their kids diabetes-and I am wondering how I can step into this mix and offer a means to help the parents give more responsibility to their kids-and more freedom.

But what can I possibly have to say to these parents? I don’t have kids-let alone a child with diabetes. I don’t know what it’s like to fret and worry over someone else’s life as it develops around a complicated medical condition. Sure, I have diabetes, but that’s easy to deal with since it’s mine and no one else’s. It’s become second nature to me-but that won’t help anyone else but me.

Day two, we are hiking in the Narrows of the Virgin River in Zion. We are surrounded by looming and magnificent walls of the worlds largest slot canyon and the kids seem impervious to their surroundings-they are just being free, having fun, splashing around in the water without a care in the world.

I stand back again, watching the parents taking ownership of their kids diabetes, reminding them to test, even testing for them. I want to say something, but I just don’t know what to say or how. Everyone is having a blast-why ruin it? Lets just have some fun and that’ll be that.

Day three, our final day together, I have collected my thoughts and I am ready to issue a challenge to the group. I have found the words and I know that after two days of growth together, we are at a good place to push the envelope. I have seen moments of brilliance and initiative from the kids and I want to find a way to help that grow. I need them to step up and do more for themselves:

We have all had a great deal of fun and enjoyed playing together and seeing some spectacular things that are unique in the natural world. But if we leave this camp with only “fun” to show for our time, then we have missed something really important. We are here to challenge ourselves and our notions of diabetes-and to really explore how it impacts our relationships. Parents: I want you to think about how you can step back and give your kids more freedom and responsibility in their management of diabetes. Kids, I want you to think about how you can take control of your own diabetes rather than relying on your parents.

I can’t tell if I have just ruined the weekend by issuing such a challenge or if I have actually succeeded. Time will tell, so we gather our gear and head out to the trailhead from which we will approach the canyon. As we arrive at the trailhead, I explain that my plan for the day is for our group to separate-Stefanie and I will take the kids via one route while Rob will take the parents via another one. We will meet up later in the day, I assure everyone. Parents look as though I have just given them the news of a sickly relative having just passed away. They knew I was going to ask this of them at some point and that time was now. I want to get moving before the parents change their mind or begin to worry, so I begin packing my gear.

As I am packing, one of the parents, Jason, the same T1 climber who I climbed with on the final day of Project365, takes me aside to speak about his daughter, Kaia, who also has T1. He expresses deep concern and discomfort with the idea of letting Kaia be responsible for her own management, even for several hours, given the fact that we are in a technical environment where a lapse in blood sugar management could have much higher consequences than a school day for example. Jason is an informed customer, with an understanding of the risk factors for diabetes and climbing and rappelling. Part of me feels like I should just say “Ok, fine, lets just put everyone together”.

I know that if I back down, we can still have a fun day out. But I want more than fun for these families. We must push beyond that point of pure fun if we want growth to happen. I weigh my options and I try to assuage Jason’s concerns, point by point. I am surprised that I have reasonable solutions for each point-and I am starting to think that maybe I have more to offer these kids than I had initially thought.

I am watching the struggle play out on Jason’s face as he talks to me. I know it’s not about me. I know he trusts me and thinks I’m competent-but that doesnt make it easier. The struggle is in the heart, not the mind. Letting go is war. In a split second, I see Jason’s demeanor change. He has chosen to step back and give Kaia an opportunity to take control-by relinquishing his own control. I want to start blubbing like a child and give Jason a hug because I just saw him take on a monumental challenge and vanquish it. I am so proud of him.

But I can’t celebrate yet. I have to make sure that I am on top of the kids safety and blood sugar management. We start off down the trail leaving the parents to go their own way. Stefanie and Nick come with us and the children lead us, exploring and planning how they will face the obstacles ahead.

We stop and check BGs together. The kids share strategies for how they are managing their sugar. Their siblings are along with them and they are answering my questions too-I am beginning to see that there is SO MUCH depth in these kids. Kaia goes out of her way to reassure me that she knows what she is doing-and why-and lists anticipated problems and solutions as we are getting situated near our first rappel.

As we begin the technical part of our day (ropes, carabiners, harnesses, cliffs etc) I ask Grace, the first camper to descend our first rappel to hook herself up. I don’t remind her of what she learned two days prior. I watch her struggle. I want to give her a chance to problem solve, not steal that victory from her by simply fixing the problem myself. She sorts out her setup like a champ and off she goes.

In fact, every single one of the kids has their rappelling setups dialed. I don’t even have to remind ONE of them to lock a carabiner or anything, throughout the day.

Towards the end of the day, when the parents met us at the exit of the canyon, I watch Kaia interacting with Jason. I am still on rappel and I look down at them as they stand together on the ground-Jason wants to help her bolus for her meal but she waves him off and assures him that she has it under control.

We head back to Springdale for the Project365 premier and I am no longer thinking about the edits I have to make before this rough cut can become the final cut. I am not thinking about the fact that I still have no backers to help fund the movie. I don’t care that we had to borrow the gear to make this camp happen or that my apartment is filling up with boxes because I have no place to store the camp gear other than my sofa. I am not worried about whether or not people will like the movie when we show it-I am not concerned about having money to pay rent in the next several months.

Everything in my world changed. I saw the most amazing things happen-people with diabetes finding incredible strength and self reliance in themselves at 8 years old, in high risk environments-being responsible and managing risk and not being limited by diabetes. I saw the parents push themselves in huge ways as they chose to step back and trust us-and their kids.

When we got back to town, the premier was an absolute riot-we packed out Deep Creek Coffee with more people than the owners, Scott and Heidi had seen there previously. Everyone who spoke to me said they loved the movie-many asked then and there to buy a copy. No one seemed to notice that it was just a rough cut. People were really excited and inspired.

I began to realize that I found my way to this point by following my heart, not by trying to make money. If the companies want to support the movie, then great. If they don’t then I’m not going to worry about that. I know that the message is there-and that the message of changing lives and empowering people with diabetes is the most important thing in my life. I am proud to be scrappy and hungry-and as we reflected on the weekend with our friends Lee and Alan (my former clients when I used to guide for Zion Adventure Company who traveled to Utah from Scotland to be part of the camp weekend and the film premier) it felt amazing to know that this moment was OURS. We did this on our own with grassroots support from people who care-not because we have a big budget. It was pure, it was beautiful and lives were changed-at least one, speaking for myself.

I am infinitely grateful for the support of Stefanie, Nick and Rob who were amazing guides, facilitators and photographers-they gave their time freely, and applied their expertise gladly. Special thanks to Deep Creek Coffee who fed us and hosted the premier-wonderfully, I might add. Zion Adventure Co helped us in many ways in terms of coordinating logistics and gear-specifically Bill “Sweet William” Dunn and Shelley Buckingham who went above and beyond to make sure we had the tools needed to be safe and have fun. Imlay Canyon Gear donated a lot of gear to us that made our adventures possible and that will continue to facilitate future adventures.

To all the parents who came out-thank you-there is no greater gift or compliment than trusting your children to us as guides in technical environments. We are in your debt. To all the friends who came out to see the film and support our work, we thank you and we love you.

Nothing to see here folks, move along!

By MainAdmin on June 30, 2013 in film, project 365

I have a lot going on over the next several weeks, so I want to make sure everyone is in the loop. I am heading to California for some training in sub 100 degree weather for the next week-Kilimanjaro is about 2 months away and I want to be ready!

Meanwhile, we are going to be launching a whole new website (quite beautiful!) thanks to MesaMedia.co and once that goes live you will be able to see the new Project 365 trailer I have been working on. And speaking of the Project365 film, I finished the rough cut and have been screening it with select critics and so far much of the feedback has been very positive-based on that, I am confident in inviting you to Springdale UT on July 28th for our screening of this rough cut at Deep Creek Coffee!

We are going have giveaways, prizes (possibly a raffle or three) and t-shirts and hats for sale. Also…there will be great food and you will get to be among the first to see the Project365 film!

Following this showing of the rough cut at Deep Creek, the video won’t be seen until the final cut is finished and we begin presenting it around North America during the fall tour! So if you have a venue near you that might be interested in hosting a viewing of our film, drop us a note! Following the tour (fall/winter 2013/14) the film will be available to stream (or download for a fee) right here!

Meanwhile, we have new projects to unveil, an online store coming soon where you can buy photo prints and other merchandise, and I will be attempting to summit the highest mountain on the African continent and share that experience with you for the sake of diabetes empowerment-right here through a series of short films.

I am so thankful and excited to have the support of so many wonderful people as LivingVertical turns the corner and begins moving past Project365 and really starts to grow!

Adversity: the greatest teacher

By MainAdmin on June 23, 2013 in LivingVertical

I’d been up devils tower before; twice. The first time in 2009 was a long day, but at that time, I was new to climbing and setting a tedious pace was to be expected. Just prior to Project 365 in 2011 I summitted the tower for a second time with a good friend during a casual morning of climbing. It was encouraging to see tangible progress in my climbing. But that was two years ago.

My first trip up Devils Tower in 2009.

This past week I was shooting for my third time up, this time with Martin and Stefanie and nothing felt right. I was tired. My sugar was constantly dropping and I felt panic whispering in my ear. To make things worse, a lightning storm blew in out of nowhere. It was a culmination of all the scenarios that had individually lurked in the dark corners of my mind. We made a difficult decision to bail off and as the wind started to shriek and the lightning crackled in the ever-closing distance, I couldn’t help thinking about the fact that “a little lightning” could easily turn a fun afternoon into a body recovery mission.

No big deal-just “a little lightning”!

Back on the ground I realized that we made the right decision. This was risk management. Anticipating and reacting. The fact that the wrong decision exists in conjunction with the right one makes for close calls, but the awareness and attention to detail will always separate the two.

Martin and I discussing route finding and various scenarios we could encounter-and ways to escape in emergencies.

But this was only the beginning of risk management for me. Martin and I agreed to take a rest day (a luxury after Project 365!) and during that time I decided to make some alterations to my insulin regimen to hopefully straighten out my lows that I had experienced earlier. They say you should never make changes on race day, but I was never a good runner-so I decided to try decreasing my basal insulin so that I would have “room” to take some fast acting insulin and smooth out post-mealtime highs.

After a rest day off, I was ready enough to try things out on the wall on our final day at Devils Tower. That night as I was trying to get to sleep though, I had a very fast moving hypo episode that came out of nowhere. I didn’t even feel it coming, which is unheard of for me-fortunately my CGM alerted me and I started pounding candy which allowed me to put the brakes on it. I had only taken a tiny amount of insulin to correct a high from earlier in the evening. I hadn’t experienced that sort of super rapid hypo in many many years-and the last time that had happened, I was able to look back and deconstruct the various things I had done wrong-and learn from it. This time though, I had no idea what I had done wrong.

Not all the biggest challenges take place in the vertical world. In diabetes, risk management continues long after the ropes are coiled.

It was like my entire diabetes playbook had been thrown out the window. I was rendered a complete beginner, a victim of whatever diabetes decided to do to me. How had I let this happen? I was supposed to wake up the next morning and summit, and now…it seemed like the very idea of climbing was asking for trouble. Suddenly all of my rhetoric about being empowered turned to sand in my mouth. I was helpless, pinned down and a victim. Despair quickly followed the fear and I went to sleep hoping that I would wake up and it would all just be a dream.

Nope.

I woke up in the morning and I realized I had a decision to make. I realized that just like the fast moving lightning storm from earlier in the week, I had come close to another bad outcome, but I had acted and been able to change the result. I wasn’t a victim just because I had a bad low. I was tired and pissed off, but the reality was that I had been able to respond and deal with the challenges that had been thrown at me. I had been tested in big ways-ways that I had thought about and worried about for years, but never really experienced. Suddenly I felt strong. The challenge was still there, but I was able to face it because I knew I could do it. Better yet, I wasn’t alone-Martin was bringing his diabetes up Devils Tower too, and together we had a lot of resources to face challenges.

Martin and I negotiating the approach to our route, (Soler 5.9) via 4th class slabs on the southeast shoulder of Devils Tower

That morning when I met Martin and told him about the previous nights ordeal, he smiled and said “Right, well you have to expect that if you’re trying a new regimen, there will be some bumps along the way!”

He was totally right-and I had not cut myself any slack or left room for that learning curve. So I skewed toward the high side that morning as Martin and I set out on our final summit attempt. My blood sugars were hovering right around 300 for much of the morning. Ordinarily I would be really unhappy with those readings but I felt good and I just kept drinking water and focusing on the climbing.

staying focused!

And the climbing…well that part was superb.

look closely…this is the beginning of the first pitch from the ground…zoomed in a bit.

Not letting diabetes keep us down!

Martin and I moved quickly and efficiently. Knowing that Martin knew exactly what I was dealing with made me feel much more confident and willing to push myself. We had been tested together, as a team and come out of the ordeals stronger.

Beautiful pitches of cracks that go on and on…and on.

Martin at the belay.

Martin climbing pitch 2, laying it back!

We summited shortly after noon on a harder route than we had tried the first day! We were the first recorded team of Type 1 climbers to summit Devils Tower together via this route (Soler)-to the best of our knowledge-and that of Google.

The final 4th class route to the summit.

The solitary, nondescript summit of Devils Tower-under the boots of Team LivingVertical!

When we returned to the ground, the trip was basically over.

The summit is only halfway. To be fair, achieving the summit is optional. Getting back to the ground is not.

Our descent from slightly farther away…

There were a lot of people who were excited to see and hear about our take on diabetes empowerment!

Tools for diabetes risk management.

Time to go back home and get back to work. Website renovations, the documentary, training for Kilimanjaro, SweetestSummit camp all while figuring out how we are going to pay the bills-but this was another life changing, eye-opener. Sending summits as part of a T1D Team…there’s nothing like it. Sure, there is the individual accomplishment, but that pales in comparison to the bond of the rope and the partnership we can share in embracing challenge-in and out of the vertical world as people with diabetes!

Team LV 1-diabetes 0.

Special thanks to Stefanie for taking the climbing photos for us while we were on the wall! Frank Sanders of Devils Tower lodge provided us with a free place to camp, and Hans and Lilo Fuhrer- Martins parents- provided us with post-climbing refreshment, entertainment, and stories of their decades in the mountains! We couldn’t have done it without you all-thank you!

Devils Tower

By MainAdmin on June 19, 2013 in LivingVertical

Devils Tower is a magical place-a lot of who we are today was spawned on the cliffs of this magnificent piece of stone. It was my first proper multipitch climb and it is where I became interested in guiding. In 2011, I came here for inspiration as I was formulating the groundwork for starting LivingVertical prior to Project365.

Coming back with Stef has been a wonderful rekindling of past memories-and coming here to meet Martin, my good friend and climbing partner (and T1d partner) has given me ideas and inspiration for the future!

We took an easy day to warm up on Monday, during which time I found out that all of the video editing I have been doing over the last 4 months hasn’t helped my climbing…I’m woefully out of shape.

Nevertheless, Martin was looking to test himself on some climbs so we decided that I would lead a pitch or two and follow his lead on the rest and together we would reach the summit! So yesterday, TeamLV headed out to get it done-Martin, me and Stefanie. It was hot. We weren’t moving rapidly-just taking our time enjoying the freedom of having some air beneath us.

Unfortunately the same was NOT true about the weather. By the late afternoon we were spitting distance from the summit and black clouds were rolling in fast-the wind was starting to howl and we had to make a decision to go for the summit and take the risk of getting into a bad situation on the descent-or bail and come back again later in the week.

We agreed to bail, rappelling off 500 feet or so to the ground, and not a moment too soon! So we will be back to attempt the summit probably tomorrow.

Meanwhile I had to cut back my basal a lot…I was just going low all day without even taking any fast acting insulin-I had a lot on my mind yesterday afternoon during that storm and descent!

Huge thanks to my partners Stef and Martin for keeping cool in a tough situation-further proving that we CAN take our diabetes anywhere we choose, and that diabetes isn’t the biggest challenge we can face in our lives!

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