Episode 40 The glass half empty: 10 reasons you shouldn’t try to live the dream
In recent episodes I’ve focused on informing and enabling those who are interested in trying to live the dream”. Of course, the whole concept of there being a “dream” in the first place is totally flawed. My goal isn’t to get all existential with you-but rather take a slightly different angle on the pursuit of goals, using my own upcoming lifestyle shift as an example. This episode is an examination of 10 drawbacks to any risky pursuit-and I have continuously been rolling them around in my own head. I decided long ago that if I could be talked out of this adventure, then I shouldn’t be going for it in the first place. Any goal you will pursue will require that view of the drawbacks to be understood and accepted-the specifics of my own process are only a starting point for that process.
Here are the 10 reasons that one might not want to try and live the dream. I know it may sound like I’m giving advice here but in reality, these are the thought processes that I’ve been working through. Once I got to the point that these reasons not to try no longer posed a threat to my desire to make this move, I decided it was time to get the ball rolling.
- Adventure is often romanticized Don’t believe the hype. It’s more complicated than just flannels, VW vans and hot coffee.
- Living the dream is not an escape Most of the baggage and challenges of normal life are still part of the process.
- It’s not like you’ve imagined Looking at pictures doesn’t capture how it actually feels to be in the thick of it, day in and day out.
- Are you durable enough? If a life of adventure is measured only by its high points, there would be a lot more people doing it. The true measure is more about how many low points you are willing to endure.
- Everyone on social media will flame you See also: “Reddit”. Seriously though, be prepared for people who don’t get what you’re doing or care to understand it.
- The highs are high, but the lows are low Will it be worth it when you’re at the low points or will that cause self-sabotage?
- It costs a lot to live “free” It’s certainly possible to adventure on a budget, but making that financially viable isn’t always doable. Financial commitments aren’t always flexible.
- Now isn’t the right time There is never a “good” time to take a chance. Sometimes that can be an excuse to avoid taking action-but many times it’s an important consideration. The good thing about timing is that it’s inherently dynamic. Patience will often change the outcome.
- You can’t bring fear with you on the journey It’s pretty likely that failure will occur. That has to be understood and accepted-the fear of failure will do much more damage than the actual failure.
- There might not be a way back What if you’re going out on a limb and there’s no way to back-pedal when it’s not what you bargained for? It has to be worth it to leave the status quo and let go.
Bottom line-this all comes down to dealing proactively with fear. Listening to rational fears and addressing them-while tuning out irrational fears that just serve to confuse.
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“You can’t bring fear with you on the journey.”
Interesting concept: I’ve been doing this for several decades (November of 1995), from the Alleghenies to the Supes, J-Tree to the Rockies and back again, and have yet to accomplish that feat.
Fear is natural in unknown circumstances; it is a survival trait to increase your awareness and allow you to respond with greater speed. The difference between man and beast, between victors and victims, is either being ruled by that fear, or using it to sharpen your skills, expand your awareness and increase your knowledge.
For myself, I would say that you have to be a bit like the Fremen of Dune: Accept your fear, embrace it as natural, find its causes, do what you can to address them, and then let it go.
What is most important, for me, is understanding that the fear will return, from time to time; some of them the worst of times, when your worst fears are realized, some of the them in the glow of victory when you can laugh about the size of those fears compared to the challenge, or congratulate yourself on overcoming a challenge that you had not quite understood and conditions you had not feared quite enough, but survived nonetheless, learned from, lived to tell the tale and pass on your lessons.
Just my 2 cents’ worth.
Love the posts, love the pics, hope we run into you somewhere out there, on the Path Less Taken.
Climb on-
Mike and Cindy, the Smoke Hole Gypsies
I don’t disagree with that at all! See you out there!